My doctor must think I'm a glutton for punishment

As I told you in the last post, my progesterone tests came back level 1 as opposed to the normally accepted level 3. As part of my previous protocol, if 14 days after my positive opk came without sight of Aunt Flo, I was supposed to take a pregnancy test. As luck would have it, day 14 was Saturday. So yesterday, I called my doctors office and asked them if they still wanted me to take a pregnancy test. While, yes, we were on day 16 of no sign of AF, I felt it silly to get my hopes up and take a pregnancy test with my progesterone levels so low. I wanted to the doctor to guide me...telling me to either take one or read the blood work as basically a no-way-in-hell-you're-pregnant-cause-you-basically-didn't-ovulate-stupid. Today the nurse, whom I'm finally remembering is named Nurse C, called me back and relayed the doc's message :

"With your progesterone level at 1 instead of a 3, we cannot be confident that you ovulated. BUT, we would like you to take a pregnancy test tonight, just to be sure. Then call us back tomorrow." 

Sure thing Doc. Apparently, you must not be aware that every stick I pee on, and subsequently receive the glaring negative from, is in fact a punch to the stomach each time. Yeaaaa, it fucking blows. I've now decided that I'm going to try and see that little non-two-pink-lines-result as a positive thing. From now on that negative will remind me that for the next few days I have free reign on Happy Hour without feeling any ounce of guilt. I've heard of this new Skinny Girl Sangria? That damnable little stick just gave me the green light to down a whole bottle before deciding if I like it. Hell, maybe I'll buy two different flavors and see how good BOTH of them are. Lush Lindsay, appearing for duty!!
I guess, now since my body has decided to not ovulate either, it's back to the drawing board with my doc. I figure you guys can just start calling me Murphy. Anything that can, will go wrong...especially with my shoddy reproductive system.